Krikey!  Nemo’s back and I didn’t recognize him at first.  He smelled different too.  We went right up on the hill so he could roll over and over and try to get the powder off him.  I couldn’t find any rabbit or deer poo so he had to make due with weeds.  And of course, he’s gone crackers again, three howling fits and toilet paper torn off the roll in the purple bathroom.  Maybe he missed me, maybe I’m the reason for the toilet paper!  No sir mate, you can just get over it!  Grooming happens!  I’m not carrying your mental health on my shoulders.  I’ve got enough to worry about, it’s 5:00 croc season somewhere and I’m not letting Graham see my sensitive side.    Huck

“Yee Haw!  Momma Dog made my grooming appointment with Kathy!”

“Thank the great dog!  Your fur would make a mink gag!”

“Well, every time she got ready to get me groomed, it rained or turned cold.”

“Plus your gigantic fluffy feet drag in an acre of dirt and leaves every day!  I wonder if I’m getting groomed too? ”

“Huck if we groomed you and trimmed your fur, people would think you’re a rat!  You’ld be sticking out of a trap somewhere.”

“Would not, you fur nightmare!”

“Would too!”

“Not, I’m going to tear your gorilla’s arms off while you’re gone!”

I’ve had my big, fluffy feet out in the rain again today chasing a rabbit.  He must have had his lucky feet on because he got away.  Next time we’ll get him.  Affectionately, Nemo

The grasses and plants of the field were covered with dew this morning as we climbed the hill.  It has been a beautiful spring, albeit rather cool.  All three of us plus one cat have wet feet.  That’s fourteen feet between us.  We have a Baltimore Oriole who wants to live in the house with us.  He has been sitting on the window ledge of VOG’s office chirping and bonking his head on the glass for two days.  We have gone out to chase him away twice, and put a blanket on the window, but he still thinks he should get in here.  Huck and I will make a necklace out of him if he does, everyone knows houses are made for people and dogs, he can go and live in his own house outside.

“Bring the net Huck!”

“Nemo would you come over here and help me did out this mole? I think we need to dig from both ends and trap him in the middle.”

“He’s probably not even in there Huck, he probably dug this tunnel in the middle of the night.  He’s only after insects.”

“You mean he’s nocturnal?  You mean I’m going to have to stay up all night to catch him?  Stay out here in the cold where the vampires can get me?”

“Yes, and I’m going to move over to your spot on the electric blanket and sleep next to Momma Dog!”

“Krikey!  Maybe I’ll let him live this time, after all he’s just tunneling out here behind the barn.  We’re getting to the good part in “Twilight” now where the vampires are playing baseball and the blood suckers are coming and Bella is out there, and they can smell her, yep, I’d better stay inside tonight.”

“I’ll be glad when we get back to reading about Jan Karon’s town of Mitford.  Dreaming about those vampires makes you kick your back legs right into my side!”

“I’m hunting with the pack Nemo, chasing food.  Do my fangs look a little longer to you?”

“

“My gosh Nemo, we haven’t been on the computer in ages!”

“I know, it’s been raining all the time and if I never see another croc on tv, I’ll be estatic!  Momma Dog’s decided to “go with the flow” and is reading Twilight by Stephenie Meyer.  Chances are we won’t be climbing the hill at night for awhile.  I think it’s about vampires or werewolves or something!”

“Let’s jump out of the closet tonight and scare her!  We could wear our Halloween teeth.”

“Aaaaaggghhh!”

“Nemo, let go of my neck!”

We were up on the hill by 7:15 this morning and surprised a wild turkey hen.  We gave each other a startled look, then the beast came out in us and we gave chase.  Great Dog, those big squawkers can fly a long ways to be so heavy!  Both of us got nasty thorn branches stuck in our fur and had to drag ourselves back home on three legs.  Sometimes Mr.  Scissors can be your friend!   Plus we smell like wild garlic.

“Huck, we’ve got to get Momma Dog something for Mother’s Day.”

“How about a chew bone?”

“I don’t think she likes chew bones, I’ve never seen her gnawing on one.”

“Let’s get her some, and then if she doesn’t like them, we’ll eat them!”

“Do you think Russell will get voted off tonight?”

“That weasel is so tricky Nemo, he’ll probably find some way to slide out of it again.  He might even win Immunity!

“Yesterday was the Mother-Daughter tea at the assisted living facility so our Momma Dog had to wear a hat.  We couldn’t believe it, our Momm Dog with a big plumpy hat on her head.  Huck tried to tear it off when she sat down on the bed and wear it himself, but she was too fast for him.  Luckily, she didn’t wear it on our dog walk.  I’m glad I don’t have my “field cut” yet, because it was only in the forties this morning.  I’m looking pretty shaggy right now.”   Affectionately, Nemo

We’ve been mowing, our fur is covered with pieces of grass and now Huck is hogging the remote!

“Huck, give me the remote right now!  You’ve seen that same crocodile creeping out from under that same car twenty times.  Why they even have a show called Croc 911, is beyond me.  I want to watch Animal Planet.”

“I want to know if he throws the rope with his right or left hand.”

“Why do you even care?  You don’t have hands.”

“If I put on gloves, I’d have hands, then I could bop him with one and toss the rope around his mouth with the other.”

“Great Dog!  I’m going out of my mind here! I’m turning on Dr. Phil.  Surely there is someone else that has to deal with a terrier!”

Yahoo! Found one!

“You did not find it, Momma Dog found it.”

“Did to, did to, wasn’t I right over there pointing it out?”

“You did not know it was a mushroom Huck, and you’re not a pointer.”

“Well, at least I have a T-A-I-L for pointing if I wanted to.”

“I think I’ll just squash you with my big fluffy feet, there’ll be nothing left of you but a grease spot!”